Kevin's Birthday

Today is April 5th. Friday, April 7th is Kevin's birthday. He would have been 23 years old. Hopefully I'll be able to make it to the library on Friday but I might not be able to. A few irons in the fire which means I'm a little harried but it's a good harried. Sad to say it's not that I'm making progress regarding Kevin, I'm not, but a little extra busyness on other things is good. It gets my mind off of Kevin for awhile and so hopefully a fresh perspective on things. So already I've started to think about Friday, his birthday, and, again, one of those days, anniversary days, which is so sorrowful. But it is also a "birth" day for me, as well, as I gave birth to Kevin and so one of those extraordinary days in a persons life, in my life, when the recollections are more vivid than usual.

I remember that day very clearly and everything surrounding it. Kevin was over-due, I guess you could say, but I think it was more like the doctors guesstimate was early.(and wrong) He was born in the evening. My mother drove us to the hospital. He didn't pop into this world easily. I'm not sure he really wanted to come out. Anyway, he did. All 10 lbs. 1 ounce of him. He was a chunker and ruddy with peach fuzz hair. At the time I thought Rusty would be a good nickname for him; he looked like a Rusty (Kevin Russell) but Kevin it was. A really good baby. I couldn't nurse him for long since he had too large an appetite. I'd nurse him but he wasn't content. Then I supplemented it with formula and that really did the trick! Filling his tummy was almost like I had given him a tranquilizer. Well, I could go on and on about those early times. When he was a little older, a toddler and beyond, I use to call him Aries the ram, Taurus the bull, and that says alot. He was very good natured and agreeable up to a point. Then, when he reached THAT point there was no reasoning with him. He even at times played Aries the ram, Taurus the bull. Of course, he had his Superman pajamas on at the time. He'd repeat that,(Aries the ram,Taurus the bull) put his hands on his head to represent horns and charge at me as I was sitting on the couch. I can see it so clearly. All of these memories and as I sit here I could go on and on but time doesn't permit.

So over the next few days I'm sure I'll continue to relive those early memories and think about this fantastic little kid. Terry was the sunshine, Brian was the rainbow, and Kevin was my little pot of gold. He was born, came into this world, and left it way to early. As one of his friends said, it was a real waste. But as I think of him this year which would have been his 23rd year I'll continue to think about his life and his purpose here - and to continue to try to honor and remember him especially on Friday, April 7th...