Doing The Right Thing

I thought of Kevin more than usual the last couple of days. I always think of him as I've said before. Not a day goes by that he doesn't dominate my thoughts. Maybe it's just the intensity of memory that waxes and wanes. I can still hear Kevin telling me not to take any garbage from the kids on the bus. As a city bus driver I still have a school run. The kids are also allowed to ride the bus after school and Saturdays also. Kevin rode the bus to school as so many kids did and then also rode it to, at least, one of his jobs after school. I can still hear his voice. He was very emphatic about it when I came out here and started my job with the MTA.

Kevin did the right thing. He had a little incident/accident with his car. I had come home from work and asked him about it because his car was missing. He didn't say much. A little while later I looked out the window while I was doing dishes. Kevin was talking with a police man at the time. Anyway, either that night or the next day I asked him about the incident. He said "I did the right thing." I will always remember that and it rang in my ears the last couple of days while I was fighting my case with the school vice principal at Brody (Kevin went there) and my supervisors. I lost the first round. Here was a kid who was concerned about his mother in the school bus situation speaking as a young man who knew what to expect AND he did the right thing.His insight regarding the MTA bus situation was right on the money. I'm sure Kevin would have always done the right thing in his life as he proved that evening. I will continue to do the right thing too regarding the school kids as it is a particularly poignant memory for me. "Mom don't let those kids..." almost screams in my ear at times. Kevin wasn't screaming but was forceful and emphatic in what he said to me and this has given me much comfort and encouragement. It's like he's always telling me "Mom just remember what I told you."


There have been other times where I feel like I have heard Kevin's voice. I don't hear exact words but the tone was the same. The same forcefullness. In a difficult situation I think Kevin would always speak up when it was appropriate and right for what he believed to be the right thing - even if it got him into danger. I can't help thinking that perhaps the night he died he "did the right thing" and spoke up against something that he felt was wrong...